You want me? I dare you.

If you want me, then show to me that you deserve me.

I had my heart broken so many times. I can’t even remember the times. I am almost a year single. My heart was devastated by a news from my friend about my boyfriend (that time) and she told me that my boyfriend got a girl pregnant. I don’t know what to do but to cry. It’s so painful. It’s heartbreaking. It seems like my world has fallen into pieces. But, life must go on. We should move on and continue living this life. From that very moment, I thought life is unfair. Life is heck. But, after almost a year, I realized that life is so beautiful. Just because you got your heart broken, doesn’t mean that you don’t have a chance to meet someone who’ll take care of your heart and will never try to ruin or hurt it.

Uhm. This past few months, I fell in love with my best friend. He’s REX. But, my girl best friend told me that Rex doesn’t have any interest on me. That also destroyed my heart. It’s like, He knows me so well. He knows my good attitude and even my bad characteristics. Uh. So after I got the message from Eunice, I cried. I had the conclusion that “If my best friend didn’t have the interest on me and he knows me from head to toe, then there’s certain possibility that others won’t like me too.”

But, again. Life must go on. Then, a guy who’s my former classmate in my freshmen year, broke up with his girl friend. After that, we’ve been texting each other and saying sweet words and I misunderstood it. I thought he likes me. Yes. He did. But it’s just ‘AS FRIENDS.’ He likes me as a friend, not a lover. I was hurt. I started to look at guys as a freak and ‘gags‘.

Last night, Allen texted me. He asked me if it’s okay if he’ll court me. Well, I answered yes but he should prove to me that he is serious and he will never ever hurt me. Hm. Also last night, I prayed. I prayed for a sign. I told my Savior, Jesus Christ, to give me a sign. If it’s Allen. I still think of Rex too. But, I asked for a sign that IF MY COURTSHIP WITH ALLEN WILL FAIL, THEN THAT MEANS I SHOULD PURSUE OR WAIT FOR REX. That’s all for my love life today! Fightiiiiiiing!